Starting to hear some ugly rumors coming out of the Barnstormers AAU program

Pastor...wants to take boys from his youth group to a national youth rally...insists on saving money by having the boys "sleep" in his room...uuuuh, no..."well, then I won't take the boys." That's really weird bro... Resignation...

It takes a system of "support" to keep such people "in business"...PSU, Barnstormers, thousands of others... It takes a network of enablers..groomed...talented...sick...

Players who don't know any better...parents who "need" to have their kids become college and NBA talents...gay guys who love to spend unlimited hours around "athletic boys"...perfect storm

This story will not have a happy ending...and the puke won't be far from the University of Iowa
 
lightning1 said:
I would snap a neck.
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My seventh grade son tried out for them last March. His athleticism turned some heads.

His natural position is probably swingwan (Two or three)

Thank God they were looking for post players.

We were at a youth tournament in Hiawatha today. Several barnstormers were there ( one plays on my son's regular team). The way anyone connected with the barnstormers was staggering around try to show support one another you would swear we were at a funeral.

Something did die. Their innocence. You could see in one kid's eyes (that did show up for support) that he would have given anything to be playing that day. Just to occupy his mind for a few hours.

You could see it in his eyes....
 
Stephen did not respond to multiple calls from the Register, but his father, Roger Stephen, told the AP: "There's nothing to hide. It isn't the way it looks. My son has got many, many scholarship players for all the schools around here. The team has been a great, great deal for the community. He's a great guy and there's no reason for all this to happen."

Stuff like this pisses me off. How does the number of scholarships he's gotten kids even remotely matter.
 
BryceC said:
Stephen did not respond to multiple calls from the Register, but his father, Roger Stephen, told the AP: "There's nothing to hide. It isn't the way it looks. My son has got many, many scholarship players for all the schools around here. The team has been a great, great deal for the community. He's a great guy and there's no reason for all this to happen."

Stuff like this pisses me off. How does the number of scholarships he's gotten kids even remotely matter.
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Absolutey spot on Bryce. All the material goods in the world (scholarships) can't begin to make up for the loss of a child's innocence. Roger Stephen almost sounds like Marv Marinovich. Once again you had to be at the Hiawatha tournament my son played in yesterday. Barnstormer players and adult assistant coaches were wondering around in a daze in support of one another; trying to do anything to keep their minds off the horror. Mr. Stephen probably would be best served to lay low for a while.
 
lightning1 said:
I know AAU coaches that will share rooms with less fortunate kids, on road tournaments. The kids don't have any money and the coaches want to help out. It always makes me nervous because I was trained in a setting where you never want to put yourself in those situations. My situation is different because my wife travels with me, so if something came up and we had to make room for a kid, at least I would have another adult present. But It's generally not something I am comfortable doing, so I don't.
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PCHawk said:
That's a risky situation for both parties. Kids can lie too.
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I coach our city rec 5th grade baseball team as well as a 12u travel team from here as well. The situation of kids/parents not being able to afford it sports happens way more than you’d think. For the reasons you guys mentioned I am never alone with kids. Ever. That policy, which I am totally open about, also helps parents be more at ease. It does present some challenges but they’re easily worked around most of the time.

I have one kid on the travel team with super flaky parents (one in jail a lot, etc). A lot of times he needs a ride to practice and I go right by his house, but I don’t do it. What I do, is call one of the moms on the team and 100% of the time one of them can grab him on the way when they’re bringing their own kid to practice. If that didn’t work I guarantee you he’s going to make it to practice, just not alone with me (most of the time my own son is with me anyway). I’ve never gotten flak for it because the parents know I’m not being a jerk, I’m making it known that they don’t have to worry about me being sketchy.

As far as the motel expense, instead of letting a kid stay with me I’ve put the word out anonymously via email to certain folks in our community to sponsor a room for a player/parent and never been shot down. I did have one time with the kid I mentioned before where I knew people wouldn’t want his folks around, so we got him a motel room and invited his aunt to bring him and stay in the room with him.

It sucks that you have to be so CYA in this day and age but I’m not putting myself in a bad spot and as a parent I’d respect a coach who felt the same way.
 
Fryowa said:
I coach our city rec 5th grade baseball team as well as a 12u travel team from here as well. The situation of kids/parents not being able to afford it sports happens way more than you’d think. For the reasons you guys mentioned I am never alone with kids. Ever. That policy, which I am totally open about, also helps parents be more at ease. It does present some challenges but they’re easily worked around most of the time.

I have one kid on the travel team with super flaky parents (one in jail a lot, etc). A lot of times he needs a ride to practice and I go right by his house, but I don’t do it. What I do, is call one of the moms on the team and 100% of the time one of them can grab him on the way when they’re bringing their own kid to practice. If that didn’t work I guarantee you he’s going to make it to practice, just not alone with me (most of the time my own son is with me anyway). I’ve never gotten flak for it because the parents know I’m not being a jerk, I’m making it known that they don’t have to worry about me being sketchy.

As far as the motel expense, instead of letting a kid stay with me I’ve put the word out anonymously via email to certain folks in our community to sponsor a room for a player/parent and never been shot down. I did have one time with the kid I mentioned before where I knew people wouldn’t want his folks around, so we got him a motel room and invited his aunt to bring him and stay in the room with him.

It sucks that you have to be so CYA in this day and age but I’m not putting myself in a bad spot and as a parent I’d respect a coach who felt the same way.
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I had a conversation with a high school basketball coach once. I told him "I don't know how you do it.". Dealing with teenagers and their drama, referees, administrators, parents, doctors and trainers, social media, I could go on and on. Your synopsis on the perils of trying to run a travel team ratchets everything up about five more levels. God bless every one of you who are doing it for the right reasons, because a high school coach won't even touch you if you haven't been playing on these teams in elementary and middle school. And to parent of the players- don't forget your coach at the end of the year or over Christmas wit+ a nice gift certificate or something.
 
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tweeterhawk said:
You want to. You really do. And then you realize having a father in jail (or prison) isn’t going to help your child.
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You are 100% correct. I am surprised more parents don’t snap, though. You look at your kid and all that innocence has been stolen I can see how someone would be uncontrollable angry.
 
Northside Hawk said:
My seventh grade son tried out for them last March. His athleticism turned some heads.

His natural position is probably swingwan (Two or three)

Thank God they were looking for post players.

We were at a youth tournament in Hiawatha today. Several barnstormers were there ( one plays on my son's regular team). The way anyone connected with the barnstormers was staggering around try to show support one another you would swear we were at a funeral.

Something did die. Their innocence. You could see in one kid's eyes (that did show up for support) that he would have given anything to be playing that day. Just to occupy his mind for a few hours.

You could see it in his eyes....
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I'll probably end up coaching some of those kids this summer.
 
Fryowa said:
I believe most people who commit most crimes can be rehabilitated and are probably sorry for what they did. They have value to themselves, their families, and society. They have the potential to mend their wrongs, and I know of quite a few who my employer has hired as laborers from a local RTF who snap out of it and go on to be awesome people who just screwed up.

But people who prey on the weakest and most impressionable members of society, i.e. children, should have no maximum sentences. They are completely and utterly useless to society and only serve as a burden. People like this guy should be shot in the back of the head and thrown in an unmarked hole somewhere. That’s not uncivilized, quite the contrary. It’s completely civilized...cutting out a cancer that has no value and only harms.

I don’t say this out of spite or as a knee jerk response. They literally have no value or worth as a human being, and only cause harm. There is zero reason these types of people shouldn’t be exterminated like disease-spreading rats when they’re found out. They’re nothing but vermin, only worse because I’ve never heard of a rat or snake purposely inflicting pain strictly for pleasure.

I hope this guy (if he did it) lives in fear in his concrete box for the rest of his life and slowly rots away of a horrible disease, all alone and afraid.
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Sexuality is a core essence of human beings. It permeates every aspect of our social, psychological and physiological existence and functioning. So much of our identity - who we are, how we behave, how we see and interact with the world and others - is based on sexuality.

Just like your body, it can be injured and scarred. Unfortunately, because it is not just physical, but also, psychological, emotional and spiritual, that scarring is usually deeper and more permanent. I'm no biologist but I'd bet that, because it's touches so much of your entire being, it more quickly becomes a more ingrained defect.

In my first career in mental health counseling, worked a little over a year with both victims and perps (generally, fathers) of incestuous sexual abuse. So often, the perps have had their own sexually traumatic and / or abusive experience. One related how, as a pre-teen, he and friends would frequently swim naked with their fathers and other adult men (in his case, church elders). Imagine all the "incidental" touching during such a fun activity and "bonding" experience. To them, probably normal, however, still no less traumatic and damaging to the development of their sexual identity and sexuality.

In no way does it excuse - and I'm certainly not advocating any sympathy - but it does help explain.

At their very core, these perps are intrinsically defective. Without intensive, ongoing treatment, extreme measures to restrict and monitor them, they have a high recidivism rate. I don't know about execution (I agree, it would be no great loss to society or humanity;)) but there's no doubt their burden outweighs their worth and the best way to prevent them from destroying others' is to isolate and eliminate them.
 
Fryowa said:
I coach our city rec 5th grade baseball team as well as a 12u travel team from here as well. The situation of kids/parents not being able to afford it sports happens way more than you’d think. For the reasons you guys mentioned I am never alone with kids. Ever. That policy, which I am totally open about, also helps parents be more at ease. It does present some challenges but they’re easily worked around most of the time.

I have one kid on the travel team with super flaky parents (one in jail a lot, etc). A lot of times he needs a ride to practice and I go right by his house, but I don’t do it. What I do, is call one of the moms on the team and 100% of the time one of them can grab him on the way when they’re bringing their own kid to practice. If that didn’t work I guarantee you he’s going to make it to practice, just not alone with me (most of the time my own son is with me anyway). I’ve never gotten flak for it because the parents know I’m not being a jerk, I’m making it known that they don’t have to worry about me being sketchy.

As far as the motel expense, instead of letting a kid stay with me I’ve put the word out anonymously via email to certain folks in our community to sponsor a room for a player/parent and never been shot down. I did have one time with the kid I mentioned before where I knew people wouldn’t want his folks around, so we got him a motel room and invited his aunt to bring him and stay in the room with him.

It sucks that you have to be so CYA in this day and age but I’m not putting myself in a bad spot and as a parent I’d respect a coach who felt the same way.
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Yep. That's what I do as well. Raise the money for the room. I have paid for extra rooms out of my own pocket in the past. I'd much rather do that than have sketchy rumors.
 
trj said:
You are 100% correct. I am surprised more parents don’t snap, though. You look at your kid and all that innocence has been stolen I can see how someone would be uncontrollable angry.
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I guess im pretty damn sure id beat a pedophile till the cops got there if my 2 boys were molested. Everyone is different though
 
Northside Hawk said:
I had a conversation with a high school basketball coach once. I told him "I don't know how you do it.". Dealing with teenagers and their drama, referees, administrators, parents, doctors and trainers, social media, I could go on and on. Your synopsis on the perils of trying to run a travel team ratchets everything up about five more levels. God bless every one of you who are doing it for the right reasons, because a high school coach won't even touch you if you haven't been playing on these teams in elementary and middle school. And to parent of the players- don't forget your coach at the end of the year or over Christmas wit+ a nice gift certificate or something.
Click to expand...

It is a lot to navigate through. I understand parents who just want to deal with their own kids.
 
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