Starting to hear some ugly rumors coming out of the Barnstormers AAU program

PCHawk said:
How bad could you possibly want to do something like that for it to outweigh the fear of being caught? What a sick bastard.
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Itd so bad and the illness takes over and they cant fathom getting caught or they make themselves believe they can talk their way out of it. To think I was thinking having my 2 boys try out for the team.

Fran's youngest boy is on one of the teams.
 
MelroseHawkins said:
Itd so bad and the illness takes over and they cant fathom getting caught or they make themselves believe they can talk their way out of it. To think I was thinking having my 2 boys try out for the team.

Fran's youngest boy is on one of the teams.
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Where are you located?
 
This disgusts me to no end. Would not be surprised to learn that this creep was providing alcohol and perhaps drugs to “groom” the boys for his sick pleasures.

I’m the father of a grown man who was molested when he was 16 and 17 by a supervisor at a Mid-Atlantic inn where he worked. Alcohol, pot, use of a vintage Jaguar, a leather coat — all to put our son in a position to be abused sexually. His favors were even extended to my wife and I in the form of unbilled items the few times we ate at the restaurant.

We didn’t learn about it until a few years later when my son told a therapist about it and was told he needed to be honest and forthcoming with us.

We went to the police. They took the information but did nothing, suggesting the contact was consensual. It wasn’t. If I could have grabbed the cop’s gun when he said that, I’d probably still be in prison. That was 17 years ago.

Just realize that there’s likely more going on and to come out in this case. Time of reckoning for some of the athletes and probably a lot of confusion and anger for the parents, including those of past, current and future members of Iowa basketball.
 
tweeterhawk said:
This disgusts me to no end. Would not be surprised to learn that this creep was providing alcohol and perhaps drugs to “groom” the boys for his sick pleasures.

I’m the father of a grown man who was molested when he was 16 and 17 by a supervisor at a Mid-Atlantic inn where he worked. Alcohol, pot, use of a vintage Jaguar, a leather coat — all to put our son in a position to be abused sexually. His favors were even extended to my wife and I in the form of unbilled items the few times we ate at the restaurant.

We didn’t learn about it until a few years later when my son told a therapist about it and was told he needed to be honest and forthcoming with us.

We went to the police. They took the information but did nothing, suggesting the contact was consensual. It wasn’t. If I could have grabbed the cop’s gun when he said that, I’d probably still be in prison. That was 17 years ago.

Just realize that there’s likely more going on and to come out in this case. Time of reckoning for some of the athletes and probably a lot of confusion and anger for the parents, including those of past, current and future members of Iowa basketball.
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Im very sorry your son and your family had to experience that abuse.thanks for being so open about it. I think unfortunately this is more common than many think. I think many think it is easier to supress it than turn it in.
 
tweeterhawk said:
This disgusts me to no end. Would not be surprised to learn that this creep was providing alcohol and perhaps drugs to “groom” the boys for his sick pleasures.

I’m the father of a grown man who was molested when he was 16 and 17 by a supervisor at a Mid-Atlantic inn where he worked. Alcohol, pot, use of a vintage Jaguar, a leather coat — all to put our son in a position to be abused sexually. His favors were even extended to my wife and I in the form of unbilled items the few times we ate at the restaurant.

We didn’t learn about it until a few years later when my son told a therapist about it and was told he needed to be honest and forthcoming with us.

We went to the police. They took the information but did nothing, suggesting the contact was consensual. It wasn’t. If I could have grabbed the cop’s gun when he said that, I’d probably still be in prison. That was 17 years ago.

Just realize that there’s likely more going on and to come out in this case. Time of reckoning for some of the athletes and probably a lot of confusion and anger for the parents, including those of past, current and future members of Iowa basketball.
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Can't imagine. Continued good luck to you and your son. Every one of these stories probably brings back memories that you would just as soon not remember.
 
hawkeyemark said:
You mean Iowa's program or the Barnstormers? What a situation Fran finds himself in with people already down on the program. It has to turn his stomach knowing that he has two sons and a current and future player tied to that program. How much do these boys know about what went on whether they participated or not?
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The aau which will put Iowa under the inspection collaterally.
 
Robowe said:
Pump N Run is based in North Liberty. Duez Henderson and Jason Price (ex-Hawks) are directors. Tryouts soon!

www.iowapumpnrun.net
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Yes. I am aware of them but forget about them. Actually my boys in the past have played aganst Pump-n-run as well as some of the players on the Barnstormers. Thanks for the reminder. Always had respect for the Pump-n-run as they seem to be good guys. Duez and Jason as well. Good Hawks in the day.
 
Quotes from articles:

According to the court documents, videos of a white adult male who appeared to be Stephen were also found on the recording device.

former Barnstormers player contacted by the Register said that Stephen had engaged in sexual behavior around him.

The player said he woke up to Stephen masturbating next to him and a fellow teammate while they slept in the same bed at a hotel during an AAU event last summer. The player was 14 at the time. He said Stephen slept in the same bed as his players "quite often."
 
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MelroseHawkins said:
Im very sorry your son and your family had to experience that abuse.thanks for being so open about it. I think unfortunately this is more common than many think. I think many think it is easier to supress it than turn it in.
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Robowe said:
Can't imagine. Continued good luck to you and your son. Every one of these stories probably brings back memories that you would just as soon not remember.
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Thank you. Things have turned out pretty well. Son got his life together, graduated law school and passed the bar, now works in the federal courts.

But this was a rough stretch for all us. We learned a lot about sexual predators. Much of this happens under the noses of parents. I still kick myself for not having a greater curiosity about some things. We’re much more sensitive to this kind of abuse.
 
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tweeterhawk said:
Thank you. Things have turned out pretty well. Son got his life together, graduated law school and passed the bar, now works in the federal courts.

But this was a rough stretch for all us. We learned a lot about sexual predators. We’re much more sensitive to these kinds of cases.
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You don't say how old he is. Through life, this will come up in various ways. The impact never goes away entirely. So sorry for your son.
 
tweeterhawk said:
Thank you. Things have turned out pretty well. Son got his life together, graduated law school and passed the bar, now works in the federal courts.

But this was a rough stretch for all us. We learned a lot about sexual predators. Much of this happens under the noses of parents. I still kick myself for not having a greater curiosity about some things. We’re much more sensitive to this kind of abuse.
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Any advise on how to try to find out early? What you would have done different? Like age to start asking questions and things like that?
 
PCHawk said:
Any advise on how to try to find out early? What you would have done different? Like age to start asking questions and things like that?
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Unfortunately I know more about it than I wish I did. The stats of 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys is real.

There is no way to completely protect a child from this. Perps come from all walks of life. Sometimes they are just noticeable creeps and loners. They are also high profile and often really likable people with power.

Victims can be loner kids or really popular outgoing kids. They can even groom the best of parents to get to a child. The main thing is to be observant and ask questions.

I know of a doctor, a teacher who after the abuse of a high school girl AND it became public became the principal. Another was a manager at a large grain elevator. Know a very friendly likable school bus driver.

My advice:

1. If someone is overly likable or the opposite can't relate to adults but can with kids be aware.

2. If your kid tells you or drops hints, act on it and believe it. Don't cower to authority figure dismissals.

3. Children can be trained for safety, but these people are so good it really doesn't matter really. They can fool the best of parents.


4.. Be very wary of coaches/teachers/mentors/friends who try and keep parents at a distance.

5. Be very wary of people who have access to your and use gas lighting techniques on your and or your child.

6, Learn the signs of PTSD in a child.

Unfortunately most are violated by someone close to them prior to someone more distant. Kids who have been abused are much more vulnerable to repeat abuse.

If abuse has occurred.

1. Not all therapists are equal. Very few are actually good at helping this kind of thing.
2. Don't believe the old way of not talking about it.
3. Be on guard for repeat abuse.
4. Don't cower to authorities who resist. Document Document Document.
5. Expect emotional issues throughout life. Not all the time, but triggers do happen. Milestones in life cause issues..
6. Expect people to get really angry if you accuse someone. There is a high probability they are very well liked. Family and organizations are protected. Think PSU reactions on a smaller but severe scale. Be prepared to lose relationships and fight like hell. Be prepared for a fight like hell.
 
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