Clone Fans: Please Read This Carefully

They come seeking acceptance from an older, wiser, more successful sibling.
See I actually compare Iowa to like a sister. She acts like she is big brother, and can tell people what to do, thinks of herself as very hot, thinks she's in the in crowd, thinks she is more successful than her smarter brother, but in the end has no power, is use to heartbreak and being turned down, smells like her dirty tampon, has to wear makeup to make herself even presentable and is still waiting for a prom date at 6:00 pm on prom night.
 
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See I actually compare Iowa to like a sister. She acts like she is big brother, and can tell people what to do, thinks of herself as very hot, thinks she's in the in crowd, thinks she is more successful than her smarter brother, but in the end has no power, is use to heartbreak and being turned down, smells like her dirty tampon, has to wear makeup to make herself even presentable and is still waiting for a prom date at 6:00 pm on prom night.

In this scenario, ISU is the twin that was absorbed by Iowa in utero, and now appears as an unsightly mole on our thigh.
 
There really are a ton of reasons why Iowa State fans should feel like little brother to Iowa. Here are the statistics:

1. All-time wins: Iowa 595 Iowa State 498
2. Conference titles: Iowa 11 Iowa State 0
3. Bowl games: Iowa 26 Iowa State 11
4. Bowl wins: Iowa 14 Iowa State 3
5. AP Top 10 rankings: Iowa 12 Iowa State 0
6. AP Toop 25 rankings: Iowa 22 Iowa State 2
7. BCS bowl games: Iowa 7 Iowa State 0
8. BCS bowl wins: Iowa 3 Iowa State 0
9. Wins in the CyHawk rivalry: Iowa 39 Iowa State 20
I will just ask if this makes you feel better, and then I will say it is a stupid post.
 
See I actually compare Iowa to like a sister. She acts like she is big brother, and can tell people what to do, thinks of herself as very hot, thinks she's in the in crowd, thinks she is more successful than her smarter brother, but in the end has no power, is use to heartbreak and being turned down, smells like her dirty tampon, has to wear makeup to make herself even presentable and is still waiting for a prom date at 6:00 pm on prom night.

If that's Iowa, what is Iowa State?
 
If that's Iowa, what is Iowa State?
The quiet brother that does not think highly enough of himself, can easily get down on himself due to past occurrences, never claims to be the big man on campus, does not think more people want to be like him like his sister, in the end he is better than he makes himself out to be, does a lot of things really well but nothing really great, and has everyone in the neighborhood wanting to hang out with him because he is just a damn good guy.
 
The quiet brother that does not think highly enough of himself, can easily get down on himself due to past occurrences, never claims to be the big man on campus, does not think more people want to be like him like his sister, in the end he is better than he makes himself out to be, does a lot of things really well but nothing really great, and has everyone in the neighborhood wanting to hang out with him because he is just a damn good guy.

And modest, too.
 
The quiet brother that does not think highly enough of himself, can easily get down on himself due to past occurrences, never claims to be the big man on campus, does not think more people want to be like him like his sister, in the end he is better than he makes himself out to be, does a lot of things really well but nothing really great, and has everyone in the neighborhood wanting to hang out with him because he is just a damn good guy.


Basically you nailed it, ISU is just like the quiet (loser) brother who thinks he is super smart, super handsome, and a super athlete......Yet oddly enough he finds himself working at McDonalds for $9.00 an hour, married to a fat, sweaty, bossy woman, and never played a second of varsity sports in his life.....
 
The quiet brother that does not think highly enough of himself, can easily get down on himself due to past occurrences, never claims to be the big man on campus, does not think more people want to be like him like his sister, in the end he is better than he makes himself out to be, does a lot of things really well but nothing really great, and has everyone in the neighborhood wanting to hang out with him because he is just a damn good guy.

you left out AND IS SO OBSESSED WITH THIS SUPPOSED SISTER THAT HE CONSTANTLY TROLLS HER FACEBOOK PAGE TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME HE IS.
 
The quiet brother that does not think highly enough of himself, can easily get down on himself due to past occurrences, never claims to be the big man on campus, does not think more people want to be like him like his sister, in the end he is better than he makes himself out to be, does a lot of things really well but nothing really great, and has everyone in the neighborhood wanting to hang out with him because he is just a damn good guy.

Yeah, everyone wants to hang out with ISU because they're soooooo kewl.

You're more like Jan Brady. You're insecure, obsessed with your more popular sibling, and always desperately trying to forge an identity because people always forget you exist.
 
The quiet brother that does not think highly enough of himself, can easily get down on himself due to past occurrences, never claims to be the big man on campus, does not think more people want to be like him like his sister, in the end he is better than he makes himself out to be, does a lot of things really well but nothing really great, and has everyone in the neighborhood wanting to hang out with him because he is just a damn good guy.

Why do you like your sister so much?
 
Uh, I'm pretty sure my pee-pee is bigger than yours. Or, was this a my dad can beat-up your dad argument?
 
Basically you nailed it, ISU is just like the quiet (loser) brother who thinks he is super smart, super handsome, and a super athlete......Yet oddly enough he finds himself working at McDonalds for $9.00 an hour, married to a fat, sweaty, bossy woman, and never played a second of varsity sports in his life.....
And there is sister upset and jealous of everything brother has to offer. Especially since at $9.00 an hour, brother makes a better living and gets more from less than his sister who throws her money at older men who take advantage of her, know they dont have to do much to impress her, and can get her in the sack whenever he wants it, but her arrogance says to keep writing him checks, even though he continues to demand more even after a mediocre time in bed.
 
Why do you like your sister so much?

ArrestedDevelopment.jpg
 
And there is sister upset and jealous of everything brother has to offer. Especially since at $9.00 an hour, brother makes a better living and gets more from less than his sister who throws her money at older men who take advantage of her, know they dont have to do much to impress her, and can get her in the sack whenever he wants it, but her arrogance says to keep writing him checks, even though he continues to demand more even after a mediocre time in bed.

I think your analogy is breaking down professor.
 
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