Help with Tailgating Itinerary

Ron's party starts at noon. If you come at 1pm, then you're a pu$$y.

Then again, we just may move it so you can't find us. ;)

My latest wasteland list had 18 people showing up @ 101's....coming in from Georgia, Minnesota, Missouri, Florida, Chicago, and various parts of Iowa. It's going to be the best 101 party yet!
 
You can add Vegas to the list as well.

SDK46 said:
Ron's party starts at noon. If you come at 1pm, then you're a pu$$y.

Then again, we just may move it so you can't find us. ;)

My latest wasteland list had 18 people showing up @ 101's....coming in from Georgia, Minnesota, Missouri, Florida, Chicago, and various parts of Iowa. It's going to be the best 101 party yet!
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okeefe4prez said:
There will be no chili consumed. I had a trial run with some chili last weekend and Ma made me sleep on the davenport due to noxious odors that I was producing. Second, if the driver gets too drunk, we will pull over so it's not like he's going to be drinking and driving for several hours unless he's cool to drive. Third, dump breaks will be figured in, but I am not allowed to take a dump in the motor home. Back when I crashed at HappyChef's place a few days a week during school, he always made me take a dump at the law school and never at his place. It's just one of his rules, so I'll have to go to a porta potty, but once I get in one of those, it ain't like I'm planning on cuddling up with a good book and hanging out for an hour or anything - I'll wait until a turtlehead is a millimeter from kissing my underwear and then head in and be done within a couple of minutes. You've gotta plan accordingly when circumstances warrant.
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Perhaps you should invest in a pair of these. They are definately NOT for proles.

diapers_1.jpg
 
okeefe4prez said:
Please identify material weaknesses and areas where we need improvement

Friday:

4:20 - fly to Omaha
5:45 - HappyChef to pick me up at airport
Go to pick up HappyChef's 1979 RV
Drive toward IC mocking pathetic hippies proles along I-80
Maybe at 1, arrive at the lot way out by the intramural fields, but if we get too sloppy on drive over, pull off at Wal-Mart in Newton and sleep til just before 5

Saturday:

6:30ish - crack first beer
6:45ish - begin breakfast with bacon, snausage, eggs, hash and cakes
9:30 - pretty buzzed - grab about an hour of shut eye
10:45 - wake up to watch early games at RV - begin preparation of bratwurst and Italian snausages
noonish - buddy with car scheduled to arrive in IC - bratwurst to be consumed
1ish - rounds of Jagerbombs to fuel a rally - get ride over to stadium area to hit tailgate with other buddies while mocking pathetic Penn St. proles in transit - At some point wander over toward SDK46's and Hawkeye101's tailgate for awhile
6ish - hit buddy's tailgate in KC lot to mooch a little more food (but not too much to spoil appetite for t-loin in stadium)
6:46 - Crush Red Bull followed by "in the zone brew"
6:52 - stumble into stadium
6:52 to end of game - take all actions necessary to not get kicked out of stadium or punched in the face by an Iowa fan if we lose and an ill-advised "Stanzi For Heisman" chant doesn't win any new friends
End of game - go back to RV and finish bottle of Scotch


Sunday 10 AM - ride megabus back to Chicago like a common prole.
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What happened to crushing brews at halftime? Are you losing your edge?
 
6:52 could turn into "Perform brethalyzer for Per Mar, registering a number never before witnessed, and do the walk of shame to an IC police cruiser" should you stumble into someone or stumble/fall whilst inside Kinnick.
 
SDK46 said:
6:52 could turn into "Perform brethalyzer for Per Mar, registering a number never before witnessed, and do the walk of shame to an IC police cruiser" should you stumble into someone or stumble/fall whilst inside Kinnick.
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Umm, even at my drunkest I would not submit to a breathalyzer test for law enforcement.
 
okeefe4prez said:
Umm, even at my drunkest I would not submit to a breathalyzer test for law enforcement.
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You've spent too much time studying Illinois contract law pal....you refuse and it's like refusing a driving field test....under arrest!

For sur though, email a certain Des Moines guy on here and ask him about the Johnson County jail accomodations.
 
BTR---seriously....you should also wander up the street a bit to 1212 Melrose and do the Hammer with Steve (loesshills). You'll never be the same again.
 
SDK46 said:
You've spent too much time studying Illinois contract law pal....you refuse and it's like refusing a driving field test....under arrest!

For sur though, email a certain Des Moines guy on here and ask him about the Johnson County jail accomodations.
Click to expand...

That's fine, by the time you're singled out, you are virtually guaranteed of an arrest anyway. No point in giving five oh any evidence that can be used in court. There is no arrest for refusal like there is when you're driving and you just make the cops really mad because they'll have a harder time securing a conviction and the arresting officer knows he is going to have to go to court if you plead not guilty.
 
okeefe4prez said:
There will be no chili consumed. I had a trial run with some chili last weekend and Ma made me sleep on the davenport due to noxious odors that I was producing. Second, if the driver gets too drunk, we will pull over so it's not like he's going to be drinking and driving for several hours unless he's cool to drive. Third, dump breaks will be figured in, but I am not allowed to take a dump in the motor home. Back when I crashed at HappyChef's place a few days a week during school, he always made me take a dump at the law school and never at his place. It's just one of his rules, so I'll have to go to a porta potty, but once I get in one of those, it ain't like I'm planning on cuddling up with a good book and hanging out for an hour or anything - I'll wait until a turtlehead is a millimeter from kissing my underwear and then head in and be done within a couple of minutes. You've gotta plan accordingly when circumstances warrant.
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WTF?! He sends you out to poop amongst the proles?:eek: That ain't right. My bro-in-law's brand new big-*** 5th wheel has two crappers in it for the explicit reason of the two of us to be able to take a dump in peace, and not out amongst the rabble.
 
DBorwig316 said:
WTF?! He sends you out to poop amongst the proles?:eek: That ain't right. My bro-in-law's brand new big-*** 5th wheel has two crappers in it for the explicit reason of the two of us to be able to take a dump in peace, and not out amongst the rabble.
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Well, he craps amongst the proles, too. Seff's seen this motorhome, it ain't a lot to look at and the john is just a hole with a stainless steel seal that opens when you "flush" it and it runs about 2 ounces of water down as a chaser. Trust me, if it was my rig, I wouldn't let anyone crap in it either. Plus, he has heard my story about what I did to a toilet in Japan, so I can understand if he doesn't want me crapping in his property.

It ain't so bad crapping amongst the proles. The key is to just pull a floater. It ain't ideal, but in a pinch, it works just fine.
 
My two cents...

"It's just one of his rules, so I'll have to go to a porta potty, but once I get in one of those, it ain't like I'm planning on cuddling up with a good book and hanging out for an hour or anything - I'll wait until a turtlehead is a millimeter from kissing my underwear and then head in and be done within a couple of minutes. You've gotta plan accordingly when circumstances warrant."

Thankfully you will not have to relieve the monster in the stalls of "old" Kinnick (BSD-Before Stall Doors). Now that was livin large. ewh gads, the flashbacks...

Further, beware the bridge on Iowa Avenue, clearance is only 10' irregardless of what the signs say. Just don't take that scenic tour in the RV, your AC unit atop will appreciate it. Been there, done that.

Last point... schedule a PM nap for that extra final push to KO, knowing full well you will never actually get to it anyway. Oh, and make sure to have the correct color of outer gear for your section. GoHawks!
 
ColoradoHAWKEYE said:
My two cents...

"It's just one of his rules, so I'll have to go to a porta potty, but once I get in one of those, it ain't like I'm planning on cuddling up with a good book and hanging out for an hour or anything - I'll wait until a turtlehead is a millimeter from kissing my underwear and then head in and be done within a couple of minutes. You've gotta plan accordingly when circumstances warrant."

Thankfully you will not have to relieve the monster in the stalls of "old" Kinnick (BSD-Before Stall Doors). Now that was livin large. ewh gads, the flashbacks...

Further, beware the bridge on Iowa Avenue, clearance is only 10' irregardless of what the signs say. Just don't take that scenic tour in the RV, your AC unit atop will appreciate it. Been there, done that.

Last point... schedule a PM nap for that extra final push to KO, knowing full well you will never actually get to it anyway. Oh, and make sure to have the correct color of outer gear for your section. GoHawks!
Click to expand...

Thanks for the heads up - bince we're coming from Omahall, we won't be going under the Iowa Ave bridge. I will wear my lucky Penn State game gear. It ain't gold. I wasn't a member of the spirit squad or the band thus I don't participate in these marketing shenanigans. I sit in the back row - no one will see my row on TV.
 
okeefe4prez said:
Please identify material weaknesses and areas where we need improvement

Friday:

4:20 - fly to Omaha
5:45 - HappyChef to pick me up at airport
Go to pick up HappyChef's 1979 RV
Drive toward IC
Maybe at 1, arrive at the lot way out by the intramural fields, but if we get too sloppy on drive over, pull off at Wal-Mart in Newton and sleep til just before 5

Saturday:

6:30ish - crack first beer
6:45ish - begin breakfast with bacon, snausage, eggs, hash and cakes
9:30 - pretty buzzed - grab about an hour of shut eye
10:45 - wake up to watch early games at RV - begin preparation of bratwurst and Italian snausages
noonish - buddy with car scheduled to arrive in IC - bratwurst to be consumed
1ish - round of Jagerbombs to fuel a rally - get ride over to stadium area to hit tailgate with other buddies - At some point wander over toward SDK46's and Hawkeye101's tailgate for awhile
6ish - hit buddy's tailgate in KC lot to mooch a little more food (but not too much to spoil appetite for t-loin in stadium)
6:46 - Crush Red Bull followed by "in the zone brew"
6:52 - stumble into stadium
6:52 to end of game - take all actions necessary to not get kicked out of stadium or punched in the face by an Iowa fan if we lose and an ill-advised "Stanzi For Heisman" chant doesn't win any new friends
End of game - go back to RV and finish bottle of Scotch

Sunday 10 AM - ride megabus back to Chicago
Click to expand...

6:15PM- make your way to 602 Melrose to listen to the Poem. (Hawk fan writes a poem about each game for the last 30+ years now) Just walk west up Melrose and look for the daycare center and go to the back yard.
 
Whilst I apprecaite OK4P asking for help on the schedule for the weekend, he is not at liberty to decide anything. It is true that I'm planning on taking the 1987 Class C Ford Recreational Vehicle (the "Rig") to the ballgame, OK4P will not be riding shotgun. Instead, he will be positioned to sit on the cooler in between the driver's and shotgun seats in charge of refreshment management. And while he cannot bill $500 per hour for said responsibilities, he will likely be more valuable doing that than photocopying for the partners at Biglaw Firm.
 
i just got done paying owi fines and luckily i didn't hurt anybody or myself

and all i have to say is be safe fellow hawk fans!
 
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