OK4P is getting what he deserves

Don't be too hard on ISU. He's probably been through a couple of crappy breakups where his significant other had to be taken to market.

Hey ISU, you're just as guilty as OK4P on this loyaty stuff. Let me guess, you cheer for ISU when they aren't playing Iowa right? You probably also like Iowa in football and Duke in basketball.

HAHAA I just figured you had to pay for women b/c your huge!!!! Me on the other hand do quite well and always have lol. I went to ISU b/c the engineering is way better than at Iowa but I stick to my roots as an Iowa fan. Anything else? And no, I hate Duke.
 
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HAHAA I just figured you had to pay for women b/c your huge!!!! Me on the other hand do quite well and always have lol. I went to ISU b/c the engineering if way better than at Iowa but I stick to my roots as an Iowa fan. Anything else? And no, I hate Duke.

What else do you stick to, frontrunner?
 
HAHAA I just figured you had to pay for women b/c your huge!!!! Me on the other hand do quite well and always have lol. I went to ISU b/c the engineering is way better than at Iowa but I stick to my roots as an Iowa fan. Anything else? And no, I hate Duke.
That's what "bince" is...fat finger syndrome!
 
My bunghole bled for you. I blew that 'roid moving your desk, it popped, it bled for like a week. I had to go to the emergency room DURING FINALS where half the med students at the U of I had a chance to throw their fingers up there so, as their prof said, "they could learn what a bad 'roid felt like." You just laughed. Laughed every time you saw me walking all gimpy wearing my parachute pants, laughed when I showed up at school with my inflatable donut, laughed when I had to go to the ER.

With "friends" like you, HappyChef, I don't need enemies. Keep your stupid tickets. Sorry I ever brought this up. I'll get my own tickets to Ryan Field West, I'll go buy my own grill and bring my own food. I'll bring my own beer. I'll get my own RV. I'll find my own parking pass. My tailgate is going to be a million times better than yours. Nice knowing you, man.

And with that, file this thread away in the back of your minds for January 2012, folks. This has officially become a "Best Thread of 2011" candidate.

Jon should cut you a monthly check.
 
Jon should cut you a monthly check.

If past is prologue, HappyChef and I will be banned within 48 hours. Same thing happened when that moron Secret8/ChixWings joined the old board. The guy is a cancer. He makes my blood boil and, as you can see from my signature, JD ain't really a fan of me in the first instance.
 
Hey HappyChef, I'll be glad to take those 2 tickets for the 2012 Nebreastka vs. Iowa. I have a hot wife, and we can both diagnose why KOK's offense isn't working all the time. If that isn't a sweet enough deal, I'll throw in a 12 pack of PBR, just for you big guy.
 
Hey Norm, you're on. I'm pretty sure I will get some primo tix to the Nebraska game (I live in Omaha, so lots of contacts). Just promise you'll support the black and gold and you don't plan to buy any seasons at an institution that is trying to take down Iowa, and we're good to go.

See OK4P, that's all it takes. Pick up a tab on occasion, pay your own way, and don't slobber all over yourself, and life is good.

But instead, you prefer to barf all over everyone you meet and drink their beer. Man you need a new schtick.
 
Hey Norm, you're on. I'm pretty sure I will get some primo tix to the Nebraska game (I live in Omaha, so lots of contacts). Just promise you'll support the black and gold and you don't plan to buy any seasons at an institution that is trying to take down Iowa, and we're good to go.

See OK4P, that's all it takes. Pick up a tab on occasion, pay your own way, and don't slobber all over yourself, and life is good.

But instead, you prefer to barf all over everyone you meet and drink their beer. Man you need a new schtick.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHTLIi3erIg]YouTube - The Price is Right clang and whoops[/ame]
 
Hey Norm, you're on. I'm pretty sure I will get some primo tix to the Nebraska game (I live in Omaha, so lots of contacts). Just promise you'll support the black and gold and you don't plan to buy any seasons at an institution that is trying to take down Iowa, and we're good to go.

See OK4P, that's all it takes. Pick up a tab on occasion, pay your own way, and don't slobber all over yourself, and life is good.

But instead, you prefer to barf all over everyone you meet and drink their beer. Man you need a new schtick.

Hey dingus - the dude's looking for 2012 tickets to the game at Ryan Field West, not in Nebraska in 2011. He doesn't care about all the fellas you ski poled in Hickaha to get tickets to watch your favorite team, the Big Red Machine, play. True or false, your gal has season tickets to Nebraska. True or false, when she proposes to marry you and you say yes and then you go off and get married, under the property laws of the State of Nebraska, you will technically be a Nebraska season ticket holder.

See, I'll get NU tickets bince they're darn near free and we don't compete against NU for recruits, but you support Nebraska, which is ten million times worse than me buying some Northwestern tickets to buy myself a few more fall Saturdays of crushing brews. Plus, the Evanston cops are about a billion times cooler than the IC and University Heights cops - if you have a beer on the street, they just ask you to throw it away so the cans don't end up in someone's yard - in IC, they arrest you.
 
I'll side with OK4P on this one.

You see, when he *does* show up for Iowa home games, he *always* tailgates with the cool guys at 101's tailgate. Always. And he always has a case of Coors with him, drinks Crown, mixes bloody Mary's, tells a joke or two and even brings his mom.

Happy Chef? He's shown up once....ONCE....to the cool guys' tailgate in like three years. Hell, it's a known fact HC has been in one car lot away from us cool guys and STILL blows us off. The only time he meandered over was at the scUM game two years ago when 101 had hot chicks in from out of town.

And no BS HC about "can't leave my RV" for you guys. BS. Mingle man, mingle.

AND, I'll add...OK4P has accompanied me and other cools guys to two Iowa @ NW BB games, and has been enlightening company at the Blue Stone afterwards.

You come tailgate with us cool guys anytime OK4P. HC's gonna be sitting with three empty seats around him from now on. Sucks to be him.
 
Listen SD, don't confuse a case with a 12 pack. OK4P can't carry a case of beer so I know he's never brought that much to your little tea party.

Further, did you ever stop and wonder why OK4P brings Coors and drinks Captain? Well let me clear that up for you, too. He buys the Coors on sale from the day old store and then knows he can come drink the good stuff on your dime. When he leaves your tailgate, he brags that he drinks the cheapest bottle of Captain in town and that it costs only as much as Coors on sale. And did you ever count the number of cans in the case? You are probably one of those guys that thinks there are 12 cans in a 12-pack. I will have you know - and I have scores of witnesses to this act - he will invariably bring a 12-pack with only 10 cans. So doing the math, he can attend 6 games for the price of 5.

THis is the same crapola he pulls with me. But, like you, I don't mind cause he's fairly funny, and every party needs to have a clown there. The only thing I ask is that he be loyal to the Hawks. Just read the drivel coming from him about Ryan Field West. Does that sound like loyalty to you? Sounds to me like he's a Wildcat-sympathizer.

I am banning him from my stuff, that's all. You want him at yours, then go for it. Have him sit with you, and you can all be in the end zone together. Just make sure you bring lots of sun screen so you don't have to listen to him whine about getting sunburned all freaking day until he leaves the game in the 3rd quarter.
 
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HAHAA I just figured you had to pay for women b/c your huge!!!! Me on the other hand do quite well and always have lol. I went to ISU b/c the engineering is way better than at Iowa but I stick to my roots as an Iowa fan. Anything else? And no, I hate Duke.

So that's what your going with? I'm huge so therefore I have to pay for women. And you've just now figured that out? My advice is go talk with Kool AIDS so he can give you a referral to that detective school where he graduated cum laude. Maybe you can catch the afternoon session and get your certificate to be a private investigator.

I guess I have a couple of minutes, so let me give you a little lesson:

If you understand why people really pay for women (i.e., not for the date, but rather to get them to leave), then even you would understand that what you're suggesting is stupid. If I were that fat and disgusting, I would have no problem getting them to leave. They would do it automatically. It's because I'm not as you describe (though I could stand to lose a few pounds) that I have to pay. They want to stay, move in, meet the parents, etc., etc., etc.,

Come on you tool...I can't keep explaining this stuff to you. I know you went to ISU, so you don't have much experience with women (the two legged kind anyway), so I understand. But can't you sign up for a summer class or something at a real school so you at least get to say you've experienced the full college experience rather than 4 years...or check that - in your case 6 years - 6 years of degree shopping at Walmart University.

I'm sure that associates degree from the Walmart's engineering school (which is "way better than Iowa") really helps when your job requires you to ask the customer whether or not they want the milk in a sack.

So I guess there are really two lessons here. The first is that there is no such thing as "not paying for women," and the second is that ISU should really stay out of my sandbox.

Any questions?
 
And for the record, to my knowledge, I have not barfed bince week 16 of the 2009 NFL season.

Well, I guess it depends on your definition of Barfing. I would define the term "Barfing" as meaning "any sudden or unplanned expelling of bodily fluids in either an unplanned time or location which is not caused by the quick repetitive motion of anyone's (most likely your own) hand or other body parts and whereby Ma is forced to clean such bodily fluid as part of her ordinary daily activities, including but not limited to, vomitting, crapping your pants and/or urinating in the laundry basket."

You might not agree with that definition, but if you used it, I bet the date changes doesn't it?? Heck, since I included crapping your pants, I bet that is a daily event. Maybe it's overly broad.
 
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Wow folks this is getting ugly. In the interest of everyone avoiding the ban hammer I suggest we wrap this one up.

With no further testimony I'll give each party a chance to make a closing argument. You have until 5pm today to do so. If you get ball punched at work and can't find the time then it sucks to be you. Promptly at 5pm I'll put up a poll asking Hawkeyenation to take a side.

Keep in mind this arbitration is binding, and the decision of the nation can not be appealed.

Good luck gentleman!

The less than honorable,
Duffman
 
Why wrap it up when it's generating so many hits? That's counterintuitive to what a message board is all about. Let it naturally run it's course, it's been a good source of cheap entertainment.
 
Wow folks this is getting ugly. In the interest of everyone avoiding the ban hammer I suggest we wrap this one up.

With no further testimony I'll give each party a chance to make a closing argument. You have until 5pm today to do so. If you get ball punched at work and can't find the time then it sucks to be you. Promptly at 5pm I'll put up a poll asking Hawkeyenation to take a side.

Keep in mind this arbitration is binding, and the decision of the nation can not be appealed.

Good luck gentleman!

The less than honorable,
Duffman

Yeah I don't agree with stopping this. You stop this, we lose entertainment. If they get banned, we lose entertainment. BUT, if they get banned, you know they went out gunz' a' blazin', which is only going to add to that entertainment. Give it time...they will eventually stop (or Jon will stop them). But there ain't much goin on in Hawk country right now, so might as well let these 2 duke it out.
 

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