Ideas for ritual sacrifice to appease AIRBHG

imported_blkngldFRO said:
I have contacted a few venues to see if they want to host the charity event: "fear AIRBHG give MORE." I hope doing this will make AIRBHG happy. Anyone in the Des Moines area that wants to help out let me know.I believe that AIRBHG is unhappy with the charitable giving of Hawkeye fans. He/She has decided to take it out on our RB's. To appease AIRBHG I will have an event that exploits Hawkeye Nation willingness to give.If anyone knows of a venue that wants to help let me know! If this works it can be an annual thing. Make a bad thing good.
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This is ******* genius. We could couple this with the annual HN golf event that never seems to happen.
 
There is an obvious way to stymie AIRBHG:

Abolish the running back position. Put the QB in the backfield and that's it.
 
imported_blkngldFRO said:
Maybe AIRBHG just wants to feel like he is apart of things. Maybe because of his angry deposition it's hard for him to make friends, therefore not invited to a lot of tailgate parties.

In all seriousness, maybe we should have a party and AIRBHG is the guest of honer. Have a actual fund riser donate the money to the miracle league or something (change it each year if this works). This way AIRBHG can give something positive to the hawkeye fandom. In turn he will see the charitable spirt of hawkeye fans and grant us a pass for the year.

or

We burn AIRBHG in effigy.
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This. And it must be done with great ceremony and with tens of thousands of on-lookers, ala the ritual of doing away with all worries and hardships with the annual burning of ZOZOBRA in Santa Fe.

Short version:
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYHPh71390g]The Burning of ZOZOBRA!!! 2011 - YouTube[/ame]

Full version:
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYwH8cVNypI&feature=related]Zozobra 2011 Full Show w Crowd and Dancers!!!!!! (RATE) - YouTube[/ame]
 
Could we offer Sally M as a sacrifice to the AIRBHG? No wait, we are trying to cure the curse, not invoke more pain and suffering!
 
Murph and Andy are mocking the existence of AIRBHG right now this will not make AIRBHG happy. I am very scared to find out what the reproductions will be for them.
 
Bullock and Johnson were both injured in a game against Iowa State on my NCAA 13 Dynasty, and with both Garmon and Hill being redshirted for this year, my two-deep goes: 1. Jordan Canzeri, 2. Tom Donatell. Idk...I just really think this whole AIRBHG thing is getting really serious and needs to be addressed somehow.
 
AIRBHG is an Alt.

Natty Bumpo's ghost is all upset about getting no recognition with all those Hawkeye fans thinking a "Hawkeye" is a damn bird. Leatherstocking Tales gets about five minutes recognition in American Literature class these days, and hardly anyone born after 1960 has read it. Until he gets some recognition the Deerslayer will exact his revenge by cutting down Iowa runningbacks.

DanielDayLewis2.jpg
 
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She can have my ACLs. 1. I'm done using them. 2 the AIRBHG has to be a woman, no dude would do this stuff unless 2a. The AIRBHG is a Cyclone in which case we make them play in a glorified high school stadium. (oh wait, I just proved its not a dude.)
 
I'm not going to tell you the whole formula, but it involves Wegher's jock strap, Arob's stems, Coker's pencil, and some YooHoo.
 
BaryGarta said:
She can have my ACLs. 1. I'm done using them. 2 the AIRBHG has to be a woman, no dude would do this stuff unless 2a. The AIRBHG is a Cyclone in which case we make them play in a glorified high school stadium. (oh wait, I just proved its not a dude.)
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awesome
 
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