Haters Guide to the Top 25

[MeanDrunkR2D2]

The 2011 Hater's Guide To The Top 25

10. Wisconsin. Fat. FAT. ******* FAT FATTIES. What, is there not enough cheese already in your bloodstream? Do you not notice that you people are made of 98% lipids? STOP ******* CRAMMING HAVARTI IN YOUR FACE. You're making America sick with your fatty fatness and your stirrup pants. Everyone in Wisconsin looks like they permanently live in the year 1986 and were born without a thyroid gland.

This is brilliant!

 

[ArizonaHawkeye88]

I thought this was funny.

16. Ohio State. BAHAHAHAHA. It's like voters purposely included Ohio State in this year's poll just for comic relief. And how ******* lame does OSU's scandal look now that we know Miami players got hotel floor orgies? Only an OSU player would consider a free tattoo good value for his services. Oooh! Look! I got a dragon on my forearm! PRETTY SWEET DEAL! Tune in come 2016, when the school is embroiled in a titillating, utterly fascinating mattress tag removal scandal. YOU'LL BE FLABBERGHASTED BY WHAT COMES OUT!

 

[MoseSchrute]

I thought this one was pretty funny:

17. Michigan State. Imagine what were to happen if Michigan State were to have a miraculous unbeaten season. Think of what that would do for the state. It could boost the entire area's self-esteem. It could bring in important revenue! That could create jobs and, in turn, help bring the entire state back from economic and social ruin. Are you imagining all those things right now? Good, because they'll never ******* happen because Michigan State blows and the state of Michigan looks like the setting of a Cormac McCarthy novel. It's never gonna get better, and your dad's never going to find work again.

 

[dsmHusker]

these comments are not good for the conference... I mean just saying, they are in the upper tier of the conference that give the big relevancy

 

[Doublewide]

these comments are not good for the conference... I mean just saying, they are in the upper tier of the conference that give the big relevancy

This is funny coming from an inbred Husker fan. Not surprising your wasteland University just dumbed down the conference. Too bad you cant bring in more convicts in this league. Welcome to becoming OSU/PSU/UM/Wisky's whipping boy you waste of space. I might actually cheer for Iowa to whip Nebby's ***. You thought UT and OU sucked. These teams actually play your style of football and will dominate you.

 

[tm3308]

these comments are not good for the conference... I mean just saying, they are in the upper tier of the conference that give the big relevancy

You do realize that they do this sort of thing for EVERY team in the top 25, right? They're hardly picking on the Big Ten.

2. Alabama. Oh, look! It's the school for girls who don't let their black maids use the indoor toilet! If you missed it, do be sure to check out the Alabama sorority rap, in which a cross section of the school's surrendered-wives-in-training demonstrate a flow so slow that ******* Marlee Matlin could outpace it. Here at 'Bama, you can major in Punch AND Cookies!

FUN FACT: Every Alabama player must enroll in a course that teaches them to match the number on their helmet to the number on their jerseys. It's a very tricky enterprise, since the jersey numbers are so big, and the helmet numbers are so small. DURRR I JUST CAN'T TELL BECAUSE COACH SABAN TOLD ME NUMBERS ARE FOR THE WEAK DURRR!

 

[Doublewide]

You do realize that they do this sort of thing for EVERY team in the top 25, right? They're hardly picking on the Big Ten.

You do realize you are quoting a sker? They have a hell of a time finding the outhouse this time of night.