Big 10 Teams as European Countries

When I first read iowa I was kinda angry, but they got off easy compared to some of the sec teams in the sec teams as middle eastern countries
 
Two questions...

1. Mediocrity in terms of what exactly?

2. ...if we're misplaced, where do we belong?
 
Iowa as Ukraine: One of the best kept secrets in Eastern Europe. While most people make the mistake of thinking it is a small insignificant blib. Those that have actually spent time there realize that it is a real gem. Plus, the girls are unbelievably hot and um, welcoming.
 
Iowa is like Italy: Overly-emotional and overly-dramatic. However, everyone loves the food that comes from there.
 
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